Thursday, May 29, 2008

Deep Breath

Never has that been more necessary than this week. Take a deep breath. And then another. And another, until your head is clear and you can move on. Hopefully the world around you becomes clearer and perhaps easier.

In the space of 24 hours I learned that three people that I knew had died. None were expected by me. The things you never knew about a person! One of them I knew and had spent some time with, but never made the opportunity to learn more. One of them I hardly knew but was expecting to see the day she died. And one of them I enjoyed seeing whenever she came around.

The latter I have pondered much. I never knew she was sick. I have known her for years, but never knew that she had cancer. She shared her grief with me when her husband died, but never let on to me that she was fighting her own battle. She laughed every time I saw her. She had her demands, but none were unreasonable and all were easily achievable. When she would call, I was glad to talk with her and listen to her worries about her little ones and offer help in the ways that I could. And I never knew she was ill. Just one day, she was gone. I struggle with a question I ask myself... did she know that I thought she was a wonderful woman?

And then there was the one I wished I had known better. Could have known better, but time just never presented itself to make that opportunity happen. Kind of shocking to have someone you know who is younger than you die. Totally unexpected and so far unexplained. Sort of makes you rethink things in your life.

Lessons this week?
You can never find more time... you have to MAKE it.

Take nothing for granted. Never assume the loves in your life know you love them. Make sure to tell them at any given opportunity.

Spend time watching your dog. Learn to imitate his actions. Watch him notice the little things... and then move on. Watch him take pure joy in fresh cut grass and see how utterly happy it makes him. Infuse a bit of that simplicity into your life and perhaps life won't seem so difficult.

Saturday, May 17, 2008

We're in!

I never thought I would see 100+ heat in May for days upon days. And who'da thunk it would be while we were moving to our new house? We'll it was!

Some awesome friends helped us move our things and because they were able to help us we were able to get so much stuff moved into our house very quickly. It was an amazing sight to watch. The first day we worked from about 1 until about 8:30, then on Friday we worked from 9 until 1 (I couldn't put our friends through another baked afternoon) and then today the movers were delighted to discover that they only had about 3 hours of work to do. The new fridge made it along with the TV and all of the other big heavy awkward stuff.

So the settling begins. Hazer was FUNNY. The dogs had to wait until the movers were gone and then I let the dogs out to run and play. They did just that. And when I finally said that it was time to go in, Hazer layed down on the grass and gave me a look that said... "oh no... I just got to this park...I'm not leaving yet!"

And the settling begins!

Thursday, May 15, 2008

Too much to do.... so little time

Reality check time! within just a few short hours we will have the keys to our new home! The boxes that have stacked up everywhere are now packed (in part) in the back of my truck waiting for our first run to our new house. We even have people standing in line to help us move (I love my friends... have I mentioned that before?). so now it is crunch time. I have to work 3 more hours, and then we have 5 days to get all our stuff moved in.... it seems so big.

But if I just let it flow... it will go okay. I feel it. Everything about how this house has come together tells me it will all continue to flow and come together in the time it was meant to happen.

Then there's the matter of the awards dinner Friday night, but I won't go there about that now! (I still don't have a thing to wear!) SIGH.

Sunday, May 11, 2008

Boxing up change

Boxes and more boxes. The garage has transformed into a storage center. Nearly everything we own is in a box with labels like - dvds - family room. Books, office.... compartmentalizing our lives as they are is now, but projecting our lives into our future. Simple in most ways, but complex in others.

As I put things in boxes, most times it is mechanical, but occasionally it is more emotional. Pictures that have hung on walls here that are of pets we no longer have. Pictures of us on the beach and remembering the sunshine and the fun in the sand. But I most definitely don't see this as an ending..... this move is absolutely a beginning of a whole new era for us.

We sit in the evenings now and talk about what we want to do with the new place. What color we want in what room. When we want to get a new stove. What should be done first. What can wait... so much is possible!

Must pack another box... time is getting short!!


Sunday, May 4, 2008

Down to the end

Well, we're getting closer! We have been given official word that our home loan has been approved. Now we are waiting for the time to be up and our down payment to be funded (don't get me started on exception holds...), and it is ours. We sign papers this coming Friday with more papers on the following Thursday and we're good to go.

The animals are doing fine with what's going on so far, although Kaeden was very worried as I started the packing process. He has never moved before, unless you count being thrown out of a car at the end of the road in the country being moved. Which he probably does. He has inspected the process pretty carefully and has been very expressive to me about it. I continue to let him know that he's going and all will be okay..

You never know how much stuff you have until you are forced to put it into boxes. Let me just say this... we got a lot of stuff!

And now I think I know why they say owning your own home is the "american dream" ... My wife and I have been dreaming out loud to each other about the things we want to do... the colors we want to use, the changes we want...

First two things to change??? The antlers screwed to the outside front of the garage and the cow head cut outs on the front fence.. GONE.