Monday, March 2, 2009

What a Dyson Cannot Do.

A Dyson, at least the model I have - the Animal - cannot pick up wood chips. Or wood splinters. Or wood pieces.

Okay. Actually that is not entirely true. For the most part, it can indeed pick up the majority of those things. What happens though, is they get stuck in one of the cute little curvy parts, and they don't make it to the canister.

What happens when you don't realize that the pieces are getting stuck is you continue to pick up as much wood as you can. When you realize the suction is mostly gone, you begin investigating why. That's when you take off one of those curvy parts - the one on the bottom - rather proud of yourself that you figured out just how easy it is to take your Dyson apart.... and suddenly you have a neat pile of wood chips, splinters and pieces on the floor you just tried vacuuming up.

That's when you realize you need a shop vac.

But I suppose we should start at the beginning. The very beginning... Love, Life and Puppy Dog Tales. It's been a while since I have been able to share the antics of my four legged furry ones. Today, Hazer is the star.

He is not to blame. FAR FROM IT. If I search my memory, I would swear, yes swear, as in a court of law kind of swear, that I saw Hazer before I left for work today.

I was wrong.

I got home tonight and was greeted by Please. I had Kaeden with me. It took only a short time for me to realize Hazer wasn't in the equation. I asked my wife if he was with her, and she said no... and as a matter of fact, she hadn't see him. We called, we searched, and for a moment, I panicked.... he had gotten out and taken off. How would I ever find him?

Why in the world would he ever leave??? That is not the velcro Hazer I know.

Nope. He didn't go anywhere.

He couldn't.

My wife opened the laundry room door and there he was. Then I heard my wife say "OH. MY. GOD." as she peered into the room.

The floor was covered in wood chips, splinters and pieces. Border Collies are well known for their focus. And Hazer focused on getting out.

Yes, the molding is gone. He destroyed the molding so well that it was a mere sawdust formation of itself. What was left of it had the nails in it.... he didn't eat those... he did have survival on his mind. Then he began working on the door frame itself.

To his credit, after 12 hours in the laundry room, he didn't urinate or defecate in the room
. He could have tried to go out the window. He could have destroyed the carpet. He could have eaten the nearly 60 pounds of dog food at the other end of the room. Instead, he focused on the molding and the door frame. He focused on pulverizing the space between in and out.

And thus I had a pile of wood chips, splinters and pieces. Things that a Dyson cannot pick up. At least not effectively anyway.

Lesson? Make sure to take dog inventory before leaving the house in the morning.

Although, Hazer isn't too keen on spending any time in the laundry room right now.

1 comment:

Miriam Deanne said...

Oh. My. God. Just about sums it up!!! What a good dog you have though! I might not have been as nice to your laundry room had I been locked in there for 12 hours. ;)